


Someone I Love

by GloriaGilbertPatch



Category: Suits (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-01
Updated: 2016-10-01
Packaged: 2018-08-19 00:11:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8181100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GloriaGilbertPatch/pseuds/GloriaGilbertPatch
Summary: Harvey takes Mike to task for going to Scottie. For Andreea on Tumblr.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Nothing is mine. Still.

He knew it was drudge work, consigned to the greenest associates or even contracted out – far beneath his pay grade as the youngest partner ever at one of _AmLaw_ ’s top-ten firms – but when he was honest with himself, Mike Ross had to admit that a part of him had always loved doc review. Some of that was due, of course, to the fairly straightforward fact that doc review didn’t require a law license and thus he could do it completely legally (if you ignored the terms of his billing rate), but it was more than that. There was something exhilarating about taking a room full of discovery and putting it together, turning it into a story, turning it into a strategy, feeling his heart and breathing speed up, as if his body were telling him, _we got this_.

None of that was true this afternoon, though, because this afternoon, _he_ was the client, and the client was guilty, and the only possible good feeling that could come from doc review would be a slight sense of nervous relief if he got all the way through without finding a smoking gun. Until that moment, though, he’d remain tense and on edge as he read through page after page, hoping against hope that he wouldn’t find something that would put him away.

Even if he deserved it.

He looked up at the sudden slam of the conference room door and fought back his impulse to wince at the expression on Harvey’s face.

“Did you find something?” he asked, forcing down his hesitancy in a way that probably would’ve made Harvey proud.

“Yeah, I found Scottie in my office, pissed off at something you did without telling me,” Harvey answered forcefully, and Mike’s heart sank.

“Look, Harvey, you already yelled at me about this, and I apologized, and we found another way; I don’t know why – ”

“We were moving quickly then. I have time to yell at you now. And I still can’t believe you went behind my back like that.”

“Come on. I just _asked_ her if she would – ” he began, but Harvey cut him off immediately.

“Put a target on her own back by suddenly taking a legal action against the sister of the AUSA who’s coming after you?”

“It’s a legitimate suit; Gibbs’s sister – ”

“Yeah, and Donna’s father definitely committed mortgage fraud, but that doesn’t mean we didn’t all know the US Attorney’s office wouldn’t have given a shit if Donna didn’t work for me.”

“Right,” said Mike, softly, standing up and walking over to look Harvey in the eyes. “And you know what, I definitely defrauded the United States government, but Anita Gibbs wouldn’t give a shit about that, either, if I didn’t do it while working for you.”

He paused for a moment to let the weight of his words sink in, and he could tell by Harvey’s look of sad resignation that they had.

“Harvey. I did this, and I did it knowing word for word every law that I was breaking. If it comes to that, I’ll go to prison for it. But I wasn’t gonna let Gibbs go after Rachel. And I’m not gonna pretend I don’t know that she’s really after you.”

“You want me to apologize?” Harvey asked in the aggressive, sarcastic tone that Mike had seen make grown men cry on more than one occasion.

“No,” he said flatly, still holding Harvey’s gaze. “I am and always will be proud to have worked for you. You’re a good lawyer and a good man. But that doesn’t change the fact that you’re Gibbs’s target, and I thought – I thought Scottie might want to cut her off at the knees to protect you.”

“So that’s what she meant,” Harvey said quietly.

“What?”

“Scottie,” he clarified. “She accused me of sending you to tug at her heartstrings – you told her that, didn’t you? That it was for me?”

“I know you’re important to her,” Mike said, defensively. “I didn’t expect her to stick her neck out for me, or even for Rachel – I don’t think she even knows who Rachel is – but I thought she might, for you.”

“She would,” Harvey admitted. “I just already cashed in my Mike-Ross-related favor.”

“What do you mean?” Mike asked, confused. “Wait, is that why she said she never wanted to hear my name again?”

Harvey sighed.

“Let’s go to my office, have a drink,” he said. “Discovery can wait.”

Mike hesitated a moment – the words, _Harvey, this is my life_ bubbled to his lips – but getting Harvey to share anything about his personal life was probably worth losing an hour of doc review. Hell, getting Harvey to share about his personal life might even be worth federal prison.

“Okay,” he agreed. “But you’re breaking out the good Scotch.”

Harvey offered a small smile as they headed back to his office, and did something Mike had rarely seen before, locking the door behind them. He started talking as he got out the glasses, and Mike had known Harvey long enough to suspect it was at least partly because he didn’t want to have to look him in the face just yet.

“When you went to Robert Zane last year, to hire Louis…I went, too, and I offered him a favor. I tried to take it back after we took Louis back, but Zane knew something was up, and if I didn’t do him a favor he was gonna keep sniffing around until he found out about you. Anyway. He was up against Scottie in a lawsuit, and he was gonna lose, so he asked me to get her to back off. And I did.”

“So?” Mike shrugged. “She did you a professional favor, lawyers do it all the time.”

“ _She_ doesn’t,” Harvey replied, finally coming around to the couch and handing Mike a glass of what smelled like truly _excellent_ Scotch. He sat down and took a long sip of his own before continuing.

“Scottie’s tough and she gets her hands dirty, but she always plays by the rules, and she would _never_ sell out a client…but she did because I asked her to, and I did it because I knew you’d get caught if I didn’t.” He shook his head. “She hated it and I felt like garbage asking her, but she did it.”

“I’m sorry,” Mike said simply. “I didn’t know.”

“No, you didn’t. It’s not your fault; that one’s on me. _This_ time, though – the hell, Mike? How could you go to her, ask her to do that?”

“Look, Harvey, I like Scottie fine, but if there was a chance of protecting you, of protecting _Rachel_ , there’s not even a question. And that wasn’t the only time she sold out a client for you – the suits with Darby – she’s not exactly innocent – ”

“And neither is Rachel,” Harvey shot back angrily. “She spent more than two years covering up your crimes, not to mention _using_ that knowledge to blackmail Jessica into offering her a job.”

“Don’t you _dare_ go after Rachel,” Mike answered, getting angry himself, but Harvey was clearly riled up now, and as far as Mike had come in the past four years, he still wasn’t a match for the full force of Harvey’s personality.

“How dare _you_ go after Scottie!”

“It’s not the same, and you know it!”

“Oh, yeah? How is it not the same, Mike, you tell me?”

“Because Rachel is my _fiancée_ , the woman I _love_ , you don’t _go_ there with – ”

“And Scottie’s the woman _I_ love,” Harvey spit out, “and she has been since you and Rachel were kids in junior high, so don’t you tell me she’s fair game and Rachel isn’t because you _love_ her. As if I don’t know what love is.”

Mike sat there, floored, and took another drink as he processed what Harvey had just said, trying to remember if he’d even heard Harvey use the word _love_ before.

“I’m sorry,” he said, finally, blankly. “I…I didn’t know. I mean…I knew she was important to you, that you had a thing, but I didn’t…I…have you told her?”

“What, that I love her? Yes, Mike, I’m a grown man, not a fifteen-year-old boy,” he replied, but the vitriol had gone out of his voice and affection was creeping back in, so Mike grinned.

“More than once?”

“Twice,” Harvey admitted, wryly. “Once when I was twenty-five, and then again fifteen years later.”

“You really are emotionally stunted.”

“Hey.”

“I’m just saying, I tell Rachel I love her twice a _day_.”

“That doesn’t make me stunted as much as it makes you a pussy.”

“If spending every night in bed with the woman I love makes me a pussy, then I accept the moniker.”

Harvey said nothing in reply, and Mike held back a wince. Teasing Harvey was so normal it was second nature by now, but he wasn’t an asshole, and he didn’t really want to hurt him. It had just never occurred to him – he knew Scottie was special, that Harvey liked and respected her in addition to sleeping with her. That he’d attempted a relationship with her, however brief it had turned out to be. But much like the panic attack in the fall had floored him, the idea of Harvey being vulnerable to something as normal and human as _falling in love_ …

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly.

“I miss her,” Harvey said with a wistful smile.

“Do you want to…tell me about it?” Mike asked, a little bit awkwardly. Harvey took a drink.

“She…and look, I’m not saying I’ve been mooning after her my whole adult life. There’ve been other women.” He smirked. “A _lot_ of other women. A lot of _beautiful_ other women. A lot of – ”

“Careful, Harvey, you’re starting to sound like Donald Trump,” Mike warned, bemused. Harvey balled up a napkin and threw it at him, and Mike, ever gracious, and pretty sure he deserved it, allowed it to hit him on the shoulder rather than ducking.

“Right, well, anyway. Scottie and I met when we were practically kids. She was smart and confident and beautiful and…I fell for her right away. And somewhere down the line, she fell for me.” He shook his head. “I’m not saying things were perfect, but for awhile there…”

“You think you would’ve married her?” Mike asked, honestly curious but half expecting Harvey to roll his eyes. Instead, he looked pensive.

“There’s definitely an alternate version of my life where I did,” he admitted. “But she moved to DC after graduation, lived there awhile, and then she went to London, and meanwhile I was kicking ass in the D.A.’s office, and then…”

“You lost touch. That _was_ before Facebook,” Mike teased, but Harvey shook his head.

“Nah, I wouldn’t say we ever really lost touch. We’d talk every so often. She came to Dad’s funeral...Marcus's wedding. And we’d work cases against each other, and somehow every time I saw her…” He shrugged. “There _have_ been a lot of women. But there’s never been another woman like her. Not for me.”

“Well, you know…I did go to see her the other day.”

“I know you did; that’s why I yelled at you. Twice, as you so kindly pointed out.”

Mike rolled his eyes.

“Did you notice she wasn’t wearing a ring? Did she tell you that when I used your name she saw me without question?”

“Mike…”

“Harvey. You’re forty-three years old. You’ve known her for almost two decades; you say there’s never been another woman like her. What are you waiting for? You want to be with her, go after her.”

“I _tried_ that, and it blew up in my face.”

“Why.”

Mike knew he was on thin ice but at this point he didn’t care; his whole God damned life was thin ice, and if there was even the tiniest chance he could tell Harvey something he clearly needed to hear, then so be it.

“I don’t know, Mike, because I lied to her and kept things from her? Because I’m not great at being a boyfriend? Because I wasn’t ready to face up to all the shit that’s wrong with me?”

“Did you tell her that?”

Harvey sighed.

“I’m pretty sure she knows I was a lousy boyfriend given that she broke up with me.”

“Yeah, but if you _tell_ her…then maybe you get to ask her for a second chance.”

“Since when do you care so much about my love life, anyway?”

“Harvey, come on, you know you’re important to me. I told you…you’re family. I care about you.”

Harvey nodded slightly, which, after all the sharing, Mike figured was probably the best he could do.

“Remember when Rachel and I broke up? You told me you admire what we have? Well…you were right to. My life is shit right now, but I have Rachel, and I know she loves me, and that – it just makes everything a little bit better, just a little bit easier. And I want you to have that. If you want it. And it sure sounds like you want it with her.”

“You think she…” Harvey began, looking a little lost, and Mike inwardly rolled his eyes at how _stunted_ the poor guy was, even as he couldn’t help feeling bad for him.

“I think she’ll listen,” he said. “And, look, Harvey…the way you feel about her, the way she’s been part of your life for so long? I doubt you’re alone in that. Scottie’s smart and beautiful and funny, and she never married anyone else, either.” He grinned a little. “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.”

“Wayne Gretzky?” Harvey scoffed.

“Hey, is it true or is it true?”

“Thanks, Mike,” he said, softening. “Maybe…maybe you’re right.”

“Definitely I’m right,” Mike corrected, to an indulgent eye roll. “Just call her, okay? What’s the worst she can say?”

“That she never wants to see me again,” Harvey answered promptly, “…which is more or less what she said when she came by the other day. I see your point.”

Mike put down his drink and rose to his feet, coming over to clap Harvey on the back.

“All right, I gotta get back to doc review,” he said. “But…just call her.”

Harvey nodded a little, still swilling his Scotch, as Mike headed back to the conference room, suddenly full of love and gratitude for Rachel and, not for the first time, endlessly glad that whatever his own abandonment issues were, they hadn’t yet stopped him from love.


End file.
